Clare hello, sweet mamma! I am so happy to see you publish this and hear your very reasonable plan to stay connected to your creativity. Happy mamma, happy baby. That’s what I’ve learned. You can’t neglect (for long) any vital part of your identity even as you add the identity of mother. And you are a writer. ✍️ so write in any way it suits you, in those moments you can. Creative practice is exactly the right mindset. In this season of my life my writing energy is different than it was when I was younger. I still have a lot of energy but it’s slower, deeper, not willing to be forced into old approaches that served me before but don’t serve the woman and writer I am today. Thanks for such a thought provoking essay
Thank you so much Amy. I totally agree: happy parents, happy baby. I don't get to write like I used to. There's no time for spending hours with my journal or coaxing a draft into something beautiful, but that doesn't mean I can't find a new way to approach my work. I'm learning to let go of my old expectations and to make space for something new to take shape. It feels like an evolution of my work, rather than a pause. It's interesting to hear how your writing energy has evolved in this new season for you too. If we want to maintain a connection with our creative selves over decades, we need to embrace an ongoing form of evolution I think. 💕
I really like how you have implemented boundaries, to ensure your wellbeing. Not being obliged to be anywhere at a certain time, wow that is so liberating. Frees the mind from the chatter which commences in the morning regarding places to be , planning required. For a baby, sleep is so important, uninterrupted and as required. Well done ❤️
Thank you Lee 💕 Yes, boundaries are so important. I didn't want to cheat myself (or my little one) of this protected time away from the rhythms of more traditional work (meetings, deadlines etc). But I did want to make time to create. That feels like a nourishing thing to prioritise, while the "professional world" can absolutely wait!
Beautiful Clare. You are listening within, your body and heart will lead. However you show up, is just what is needed. Each day a new template. You just birthed your greatest creation yet, your sweet daughter. Gentle and loving care to you all. 💜
I'm in awe of all you manage to do. It's lovely to read you again, and to get glimpses into this new chapter of your life - although of course it's not something you owe your readership. Keep on rocking!
Thank you my friend. This is so kind of you to say. There are days when I manage to do a lot, and days when I do nothing but feed the baby, lie on the couch and collect the food from the delivery person who brings it to my door! 🙃
Beautiful work! If you can do it, it will feed you! I love how gentle it sounds. Keeping the focus on kindness and having a supportive partner too! May you find your way.
Thank you Emma. The gentleness is so important, I think. I could do none of it without the support of my wife, but also the compassion I have towards myself for the days when it's just not possible to do anything but stare at the wall and breathe.
Clare, you share so much wisdom here. I remember when I had my first child, almost 16 years ago (!), I really had no clue what to expect when it came to shifting my priorities. As a result, I fell into a deep depression. I wasn't prepared (mentally) to put my life aside, even temporarily. This has probably been one of the hardest aspects of welcoming each child into our family for me - rearranging my schedule and lowering my expectations, to ensure I could get adequate rest instead of pushing myself like I was accustomed to.
Love how you're leading the way for a new generation of moms!
Thank you Jeannie, this is really generous of you to say. I know I'm fortunate to have the support of my wife (& broader community) which makes it possible for me to hold onto my writing self. For sure there are weeks when it's just not possible. But on the whole, finding some time to write has really helped me feel more like myself. 💕
I think periods like this one in your life can remind us of why we create in the first place. Not as a job, but because our brains start constructing something without our conscious decision to, and then we have no choice (except for bad mental health) but to let it out.
Clare hello, sweet mamma! I am so happy to see you publish this and hear your very reasonable plan to stay connected to your creativity. Happy mamma, happy baby. That’s what I’ve learned. You can’t neglect (for long) any vital part of your identity even as you add the identity of mother. And you are a writer. ✍️ so write in any way it suits you, in those moments you can. Creative practice is exactly the right mindset. In this season of my life my writing energy is different than it was when I was younger. I still have a lot of energy but it’s slower, deeper, not willing to be forced into old approaches that served me before but don’t serve the woman and writer I am today. Thanks for such a thought provoking essay
Thank you so much Amy. I totally agree: happy parents, happy baby. I don't get to write like I used to. There's no time for spending hours with my journal or coaxing a draft into something beautiful, but that doesn't mean I can't find a new way to approach my work. I'm learning to let go of my old expectations and to make space for something new to take shape. It feels like an evolution of my work, rather than a pause. It's interesting to hear how your writing energy has evolved in this new season for you too. If we want to maintain a connection with our creative selves over decades, we need to embrace an ongoing form of evolution I think. 💕
I really like how you have implemented boundaries, to ensure your wellbeing. Not being obliged to be anywhere at a certain time, wow that is so liberating. Frees the mind from the chatter which commences in the morning regarding places to be , planning required. For a baby, sleep is so important, uninterrupted and as required. Well done ❤️
Thank you Lee 💕 Yes, boundaries are so important. I didn't want to cheat myself (or my little one) of this protected time away from the rhythms of more traditional work (meetings, deadlines etc). But I did want to make time to create. That feels like a nourishing thing to prioritise, while the "professional world" can absolutely wait!
Beautiful Clare. You are listening within, your body and heart will lead. However you show up, is just what is needed. Each day a new template. You just birthed your greatest creation yet, your sweet daughter. Gentle and loving care to you all. 💜
"Each day a new template" I love that idea. Thank you Joanie 💕
I'm in awe of all you manage to do. It's lovely to read you again, and to get glimpses into this new chapter of your life - although of course it's not something you owe your readership. Keep on rocking!
Thank you my friend. This is so kind of you to say. There are days when I manage to do a lot, and days when I do nothing but feed the baby, lie on the couch and collect the food from the delivery person who brings it to my door! 🙃
Listen, keeping the baby alive is hard enough work!
Beautiful work! If you can do it, it will feed you! I love how gentle it sounds. Keeping the focus on kindness and having a supportive partner too! May you find your way.
Thank you Emma. The gentleness is so important, I think. I could do none of it without the support of my wife, but also the compassion I have towards myself for the days when it's just not possible to do anything but stare at the wall and breathe.
Clare, you share so much wisdom here. I remember when I had my first child, almost 16 years ago (!), I really had no clue what to expect when it came to shifting my priorities. As a result, I fell into a deep depression. I wasn't prepared (mentally) to put my life aside, even temporarily. This has probably been one of the hardest aspects of welcoming each child into our family for me - rearranging my schedule and lowering my expectations, to ensure I could get adequate rest instead of pushing myself like I was accustomed to.
Love how you're leading the way for a new generation of moms!
Thank you Jeannie, this is really generous of you to say. I know I'm fortunate to have the support of my wife (& broader community) which makes it possible for me to hold onto my writing self. For sure there are weeks when it's just not possible. But on the whole, finding some time to write has really helped me feel more like myself. 💕
I think periods like this one in your life can remind us of why we create in the first place. Not as a job, but because our brains start constructing something without our conscious decision to, and then we have no choice (except for bad mental health) but to let it out.